Sad news has struck for fans of the worldwide sensation Friends. On October 28,2023, Friends beloved Matthew Perry was found dead in his hot tub at his residence in Los Angeles. He was 54 years old. He portrayed Chandler Bing for all 10 seasons of the show, whilst struggling with alcoholism and addiction.
I recently read his memoir, Friends, Lovers, and the Big Terrible Thing, published in 2022. It recounts his experiences from childhood troubles with his parents and their divorce, to adulthood and his countless admissions to rehab where no amount of money was helping him get sober.
What I found inspiring was Perry’s connection to his character. Perry lived to entertain and make people laugh, and he talks about his intense fear of not being able to land a joke or not be enough. The book describes how similar he feels to Chandler, and he almost lost that part to a good friend. There’s lots of discussion about fate and how it got him to where he is. At one point whilst on the cusp of alcoholism, he prays: “Please, God, make me famous. You can do anything you want to me; just make me famous”
He yearned for fame, yet found that fame didn’t solve any of his problems that he thought would disappear.
Perry describes how his appearance dramatically changed through the seasons because of the drugs/alcohol he was struggling with. His weight fluctuated from 128-225 during the duration of the show. At his lowest weight, he said he would be taking 55 Vicodin pills a day. When he was heavier, he was struggling with alcohol. It’s amazing how easy it is to miss these things, now watching the show back I can easily tell, but when I watched it years ago I had no idea. It goes to show how oblivious you can be to the struggles of people around you. I think this is an important lesson on how crucial it is to check in on your loved ones.
Perry spent nearly $7 million on treatment, attended 6,000 Alcoholic Anonymous meetings, and was admitted to rehab 15 times. A primary example about how money can’t cure the terrible disease of addiction, and it can happen to anyone. Perry’s goal was to write this memoir to connect to people and he hoped to be able to help anyone going through similar situations.
These were just things that stuck out to me, but the memoir is filled with life lessons and inspiration which I think everyone should read. It really can change your perspective on life, and I believe that’s something Perry would have wanted.
Although it’s inconclusive exactly how he died, whether from an overdose or the impact the drugs had on his body, it’s a very sad story to anyone who hears it, regardless of whether you watched the show or not. I highly recommend anyone to read the memoir. Watching Friends won’t ever be the same, and the world has suffered a terrible loss of such a talented, genuine person.
